Five Years Of Waiting, Praying, and Hoping

He is here and our hearts are full.  I am the luckiest.

We welcomed Baby Jacob Asher into our family just 2.5 short weeks ago and life will never, ever be the same.  I’m typing this with the most amazing baby cuddled on my chest, and still reveling in the fact that I get to be his mama.  Five years of waiting, six miscarriages, 3 failed adoptions, and they have all brought us to this sweet boy.  God is so good.  Jacob is a happy baby; full of smiles and funny expressions, a dark head of hair, a beautiful tan, incredibly observant with his big eyes that seem like they are staring so intently at you, and he loves to “talk” to us as he tells us about his day. We are completely smitten by this little man.

 

We’re thankful for so many things, but mostly that God has connected us with this precious baby and his sweet birth mother, Izzy.  She chose us to be his parents and I still get emotional thinking about her decision and trust in us.  Saying goodbye to her and her family at the hospital when we took him home nearly broke my heart when I thought about how she must be feeling, but let me tell you about his amazing birth mother.  She is proud of him and her decision.  We hope we can raise him in a way that never lets her doubt her choice.

 

Izzy is loving and brave and so wonderful.  She loves this little boy so much. He is hers in a way that we’ll never have, but he’s also ours in a way she won’t have.  Together, we are his parents, both by birth and adoption, and he is “ours”.  We will always be brought together by this boy that we all love, and we are thankful to have her join our family.  He is so very special to have so many people that care about him; his birth family, his adoptive family, and all of our friends.

 

There are so many big things swirling around inside of me… hope, uncertainty, thankfulness, love, and even a little fear that something still might go wrong.  In Wisconsin, adoption is a long process.  Parental rights of the birth parents need to be (voluntarily) terminated at a court hearing, then we have a six month waiting period with visits from the social worker before we can petition the courts for adoption finalization.  So he’s ours in our hearts and in our home, but not completely ours in the eyes of the law… yet.  I wonder if I’ll breathe easy until the day everything is finalized?  We have waited so very long for him that it’s scary to think something still may go wrong.  But if he is meant to be ours, everything will work out.

This only scratches the surface of what I wanted to share with you today, but since I’ve started this blog post three separate times and still haven’t quite found the right words, I hope you can still share our joy, our apprehension, and know how thankful we are feeling.  This song keeps swirling around in my mind so I’m sharing a few of the lyrics:

 

“The Luckiest” by Ben Folds

I don’t get many things right the first time
In fact, I am told that a lot
Now I know all the wrong turns, the stumbles and falls
Brought me here

And where was I before the day
That I first saw your lovely face?
Now I see it everyday
And I know

That I am
I am
I am
The luckiest

July 7, 2014 - 10:12 pm

Kate Zoellick - So thrilled for everyone involved! Congrats on the healthy lil blessing!

July 7, 2014 - 11:07 pm

Kristen - I am soooo happy for you! We adopted our son Bryant 25 years ago in WI, but what a reward! It was a difficult journey, but so rewarding!! He now is a fine young man!! Best of luck to both of you on this amazing journey! Congrats!!

July 7, 2014 - 11:24 pm

Chris Leland - I was so very happy to read your wonderful news!!!! Our oldest granddaughter is adopted, and we fell in love with her the second we first laid eyes on her!!!! I know what you mean about the uncertainty of waiting for the adoption to become final, it was a very stressful time wondering if her birth mom would take her back…..but I can glad to say she is a very special part of our family and we couldn’t love her anymore if she wasn’t adopted!!! I wish you both all the best. Enjoy your new son, and thank God for your blessing!!! Congrats!!!!

July 7, 2014 - 11:50 pm

Beth - Congratulations on your adoption and getting to hold your newborn son. This was such a lovely tribute to the birth mother too. Wishing you many more years of happiness with your son.

July 8, 2014 - 6:30 am

Krissy - Tears falling. My heart is filled with joy for you.

July 8, 2014 - 6:48 am

Patty - Congrats! So happy for you all.. Life is complete!

July 8, 2014 - 7:42 am

Shannon Marr - I have been following your story on Facebook for a short time (compared to others perhaps). I am so overjoyed with your news! Congratulations–so many congratulations for you all!

July 8, 2014 - 9:56 am

Jenny Dregne - So overjoyed for your family. This post brought tears to my eyes and joy to my heart. Such a blessing to some very deserving parents. God Bless.

July 8, 2014 - 10:22 am

Bill - Super awesome, excitement, exhilaration, fear, wonder, nervousness, amazement, turbulent emotional tidal waves of never ending love and inspiration. Let it all blossom you guys, because for every mountain top experience there is a climb, and for every morning view of the valley there is a peace and a calm that only the creator of those things brings. God’s with you and so are all of us. Welcome home Jacob, these people are going to love you to the fullest extent they can. You are a blessing as much as you are blessed to have them. God Bless you all and hold you all in His care.

July 8, 2014 - 8:34 pm

Kelli Riese - So happy for you! Continuing to pray. I just thought you might like this song if you haven’t heard it yet https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=8lDCgxbX878

July 8, 2014 - 9:06 pm

Kendra - Oh so happy for you! Tears of joy are filling my eyes as I know you have waited so long for him. What an amazing gift his birth mom has given you. Congratulations!!!!

July 9, 2014 - 3:17 pm

Jessica Sands - Congratulations to the three of you!! Enjoy this precious time together!

July 9, 2014 - 6:28 pm

krystal - I am SO happy for you guys. He is gorgeous. Congratulations eby family!

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